Working things out-even when it's hard

Most people spend more time and energy going around problems than in trying to solve them~~ Henry Ford. In a conversation with my son, one of my core beliefs was discussed. When he wanted to leave for a few days to take a break from us, his parents, I reminded him that we as a family work things out, we don't avoid them. To deepen relationships with each other, we must not avoid, ignore or distance ourselves thinking that it will make things better-it NEVER does. I've experienced it, seen it and studied it in school. Working through difficult issues with people takes skill, maturity and a deep love and respect for others. If a relationship really means something to us, we must dig our heels in, be brave and work through the "muck", letting our pride or walls come down as we do so. Jeff had to teach me this when we were first married as my inclination was to always leave when things got hard, as I'd seen modeled in my own family. He encouraged me to stay and work through issues no matter how painful. Then I learned it to an even deeper degree in dealing with my own family relationships and through studying relationships in school. Those people that care enough to be real about how they're feeling and willing to work through hard times are usually those we develop the closest relationships with. Sadly, not eveyone is willing to put themselves out there so relationships with them are often shallow-only about the surface things. I feel sorry for these people as they will never have the deeper, at times painful, but mostly Joyful aspects of a relationship that makes life so worth living. It is my fervent hope that my children will learn this lesson now and have the courage to live a REAL life with deep and loving relationships.