BLINDSIDED

"Anyone can become angry, that is easy....but to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way....that is not easy." --Aristotle

Why the quote about anger? Anger is an emotion I have spent much of my life trying to working on. Considering this, I've been mulling over and processing an accusation made indirectly by a person in my life. I haven't reacted out of anger/hurt as I may have done in the past. Part of the problem is that these accusations were made indirectly and then relayed to me. Sadly it reminds me of the Jr. High School crap that happens with my students, ie: he said, she said, bla bla bla! Unfortunately this kind of thing has happened numerous times before, always with the same result-I confront the person and try to get to the bottom of the issue, usually to find out there has been a huge misunderstanding while they play the victim. When it has been my fault, I have tried to take responsibility for my actions and apologized, but it's hard when you're not even given the chance to deny it even happened, it feels as if I've been Blindsided. Because this person does not take the opportunity to discuss things maturely and openly as an adult, it's difficult to work on the relationship. So....how do I react to accusations that are so far fetched but are being told directly to everyone but me?? Actually, I've decided to just let it go...I've been here before and I give up, I'm done. No matter how hard I try to have an honest, mature relationship with this person, it doesn't happen. OK, I finally get it, it won't happen as much as I'd like it to. Now... if only others wouldn't be so eager to jump on her bandwagon without considering the source!! I hope this person will be able to finally get to a place where anger isn't held on to and allowed to fester for more than a year, what a waste of precious time!